Saying Goodbye

I could see this angel waiting for Charles.

Over the last few weeks, I observed my friend, Helen, and her family saying goodbye to their dad.  I was surprised how his last journey was so much like my mom's.  I saw how the family drew together to make him feel loved and safe, only looking for the better of his remaining days on earth. 

For them the nights and days of vigilance lasted longer than the time with my mom.  But the time is not as important as the love shown through the journey.  I felt as though her journey was connected to my journey, growing in God and love. 

My mom ask my sister-in-law Dar, "what should I say to Jesus when I see him". Dar drew deep in her soul and said "tell him you love him".  How simple this love, yet how hard it is for some to understand.

I write this for two reason, it brought back memories of my mom's last journey and how blessed I was to travel part way with her, and to highlight Helen and her family for making me know that there are other families so loving and compassionate. They are blessed to have each other.

Great peace came to Charles on Friday, he is well and happy, young and again with his wife. Don't you just love a great ending.

Carol

Waking up and feeling better.

Today was a new beginning. I wish I could say it was one thing that drug me kicking and screaming out of my depression, or that I am fully out. But with prayers from the ones who took the time to mention my hurt to God, and my own determination to open my eyes and hear. My angel whispering something that would awaken me.

With every vacuum and every window I wash, with every step forward I take, I knew she was disappearing from my world. Every little piece of hair the last. With a knot in my throat she was vanishing. But than, the effort of all the prayers, mine and others took hold. She will never truly leave because I loved her. Life goes on whether you want it or not.

I realized without loving this hurt would never happen again. But without love what is life about. I made a decision to love. To smile to giggle and to love. With every prayer I say, I know that prayer is the strongest cure of all.

From moment to the next, the memories will want to haunt me. But they will get sweeter with time. I will shed a tear, and I will become myself again. This I promise to all who love me.

God Bless those who helped me.

Carol